Godh bharai gifts: clothes for the baby on the way

What a godh bharai usually involves

Godh bharai, literally “filling the lap”, is a baby shower held by many Pakistani and South Asian families in the later months of pregnancy. Female relatives and friends gather to bless the mother-to-be, and fruit, sweets, dry fruit, new clothes and small gifts are often placed in her lap or presented on a tray.

No two families do it the same way. For some it is a small afternoon with close relatives; for others it is a full event with food, decorations and a photographer. What guests bring varies as much as the gathering itself, so it is worth a quiet word with the host before you buy anything.

Check whether they want baby things yet

Some families are happy to receive baby clothes before the birth. Others prefer to wait until the baby has safely arrived, and would rather gifts for the mother at the godh bharai itself. Neither is unusual, and neither needs explaining.

Ask the host, or the mother’s sister or mother, rather than putting the mother-to-be on the spot. If they would rather wait, bring something for her on the day and keep your baby gift for later, or give a card saying a gift for the little one will follow. Ordering after the birth has its own advantages: you will know the name, the season and roughly how big the baby is.

Baby clothes that make sense before the birth

• A footed sleepsuit with front poppers, such as the Sky Blue Teddy & Stars Footed Sleepsuit: easy to pack in the hospital bag and useful from the first night.
• A soft two-piece in a calm colour, like the Sage Waffle-Knit Henley & Jogger Set, for visits once the baby is home.
• A neutral colour and print, since many couples don’t know or don’t share whether it is a boy or a girl. Our post on gifts before the name is known has more ideas.
• Nothing with a name yet: embroidery can come later, once the family has chosen and announced it.

Size and season

Most families already have a pile of newborn clothes by the time of the godh bharai, so a slightly bigger size is often the more useful gift. 3–6 months fits after the first few weeks, and 6–12 months lasts longest of all. Our size guide lists heights and weights for each range.

Match the weight of the fabric to when the size will actually be worn. A baby due in autumn will reach 3–6 months in the middle of winter, while one due in spring will be in that size during the heat. We work through examples in buying for next season.

Presenting it on the day

Gifts at a godh bharai are often opened in front of everyone, so wrap yours in something that comes off easily, with the size written on the card. Keep the bill in a separate envelope and hand it to the mother’s sister or mother rather than including it in the pile. Unused pieces can be exchanged within 7 days with the original bill, so it matters that it doesn’t get lost with the wrapping paper.

A short handwritten note goes a long way at a gathering where gifts pile up quickly. One line on why you chose the piece, or a prayer for the baby’s health, turns a set of clothes into something the mother remembers.

If you would like to add to what the family already has rather than duplicate it, our guide to newborn clothes for Pakistan is a useful list to check against.

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